Here's To Us

When it comes to telling people things, especially when those things are filled with emotion, I don't always say the right things or the words don't do justice to how I feel. In these times I write songs and guess what? I've just finished writing a song about my time with Loco (a song that will be featured on my solo album, which is being recorded later in the summer). I don't know how to express my gratitude towards the people who have put so much time and effort to create something so wonderful. The people of Loco will never know how much they've done for me over the last few weeks, when I've been feeling my lowest they have picked me up and saved me from a dark place. For this I am eternally grateful to them all. I felt a shiver run down my spine as we sung the last line from the show for the final time and as we exited the stage I was overcome by emotion. It has been a long, tiring and very green journey but from the bottom of my heart, It has been a honor to work with you all and I thank you.

Peace.Love.Respect.Unity

-- Tom RDD

Loco 09/10

It was truly an honour to work along side such great talent. Loco you have truly shown me the meaning of family. From the bottom of my heart, I thank you.

Zombie Prom

Over the last few weeks I have been rehearsing like mad for the musical "Zombie Prom" in which I play the lead role of Jonny. Being apart of Loco Show co has given me a huge boost in confidence and even though it's my first show with them I've been welcome with open arms. It's been a really great experience and I've met some brilliant people. The show opened last night and it went pretty well and with two shows left to do I am determined to go out with a bang. Below is one the songs I get to sing in the show and it's probably my favourite. Enjoy.




-- Tom RDD

Just maybe you need this...

If I just lay here...

Those notes you wrote me, I've kept them all...

"Do you care if I don't know what to say
Will you sleep tonight will you think of me
Will I shake this off, pretend it's all okay
That there's someone out there who feels just like me
There is"

Don't Look Back In Anger

It's been a very strange second year at Worcester University. In all honesty, and without sounding too melodramatic it is not a year I will look back on fondly. A lot of good things have happened this year don't get me wrong. The antics at 85 have been incredible. Watching Battlestar with Taz over and over again, singing the theme tune differently each time, playing Nazi Zombies for hours on end trying to beat our previous score and many other great memories that don't involve a screen but involve close friends coming together and having fun.

I have made some really good new friends since Christmas, people I never imagined I would be as close to as I am. I have grown stronger and closer with others and sadly a fair few friends have drifted away. I have become more self confident thanks to my time at Loco and I have met some great people there that I will not forget as they made me feel like I belonged, something I haven't really felt since starting University.

However the good parts of this year have been overshadowed by the last few months. Without meaning to sound too depressing and using this as a "diary", which gets people pissed off apparently, I have been through some pretty tough times. I know my problems are fail in comparison to others but these are my burdens to bear and at times it has been a real challenge. I have been dealing with depression since Christmas and I have been fighting for the survival of my relationship with the girl I love. It has been a very tough, emotional few weeks, weeks I would sooner forget.

I still have a week left of University but people have started to leave. This time last year I was shedding a tear when those close to me left. This year I feel so detached from some people the only tear I think I will shed is one of self pity as I leave my room. A room that holds so many memories, good and bad but it will always be a room where my life changed forever.

Peace.Love.Respect.Unity
So Say We All

-- Tom RDD

My Eyes Have Seen Better Days

What Do You Know About Liberation Radio?

Today marked the first of many busking sessions. Me and my good friend Amy C went into Worcester town today for about 4 hours and sang our hearts out. We earned a few quid but it's not the money that made me feel alive. Something about playing music and people stopping to listen makes me feel incredible. People smiled at us, nodded there heads to the beat, a young child was mesmerised and we even got a shout out by our new friend who we named Smithy. Smithy came and sat with us as we played giving us praise, clapping and encouraging others to do the same. He was surprised when we told him all the songs we were playing were original and he was very surprised when I told him I'd only been playing the guitar for about 5 months. I am not a big headed person, far from it, but Smithy really put a smile on my face with the praise he gave us. It was a relatively short trip but playing music almost non stop for 4 hours in the hot sun is pretty exhausting, not to mention the adrenaline rush I received when we first started to play disappeared when we took a break.

It was an experience I really enjoyed and it really makes me think about the future. I may not be a rich, famous rock star any time soon but I can strive towards that goal and if today is anything to go by I'll enjoy the ride.

Peace.Love.Respect.Unity
So Say We All

-- Tom RDD

There's Beauty In The Breakdown

F/T/H/C

It's been eighteen months since I kissed you once,
So just saying "hi" just isn't going to fly,
But if you give me a clue and a minute or two,
Then I might remember your name.
And I hate to insist that I was really that pissed,
But to tell the truth, in my flush of youth,
I would drown my sight until faces and nights seemed the same.
And a nervous shrug and an awkward hug
Won't get me out of the hole that I've dug,
So I slip the noose with a poor excuse
And talk to someone, anyone else.
And I sit with my friends and I try to pretend
That I never did that sort of thing again,
But I'm lying to myself.

And suddenly it's as clear as clear could be:
I'm not quite the perfect man that I hoped I'd be.
And though I always tried to live an honest life,
To tell my truth I've told my share of lies.

I remember you, of course I do,
But I don't recall how many times we've been through
This little game, that always ends the same,
With you sad and me far away.
And every time I repeat the line
That the fault's not mine and I wasn't unkind.
But the worst part is that I've got nothing else to say.

And all the pretty little pictures of faith and firm devotion
That I painted as a child,
Well they have fallen by the wayside, along with all my puppy-fat,
But my days have taught me this:
That every day I spend pretending that I always choose the right path
Is a day that I choose the wrong.

Oh yes my wisdom teeth have been giving me grief –
They woke me up to find that I'm exactly the kind of
Guy I said that I'd rather be dead than be
In the days before I got laid.

-- Frank Turner, Wisdom Teeth

If You Want To Feel Alive, Learn To Love Your Ground

I really do love Mumford & Sons. I really do see them as possibly the best band around today. Yes, almost everyone seems to be saying the same thing but if anything that testifies to just how good they really are. Never has such sorrowful music made me feel so happy and made every hair on the back of my neck stand on end. Their music is beautiful and holds a certain honesty to it that only folk music seems to possess. I really can't wait to see them live this summer. A friend of mine told me that people at their shows just start to cry. I can imagine a tear or two rolling down my cheek when I see them as the music and lyrics are so beautiful and so captivating, filled with emotion and truth. THAT to me is music.




Peace.Love.Respect.Unity

-- Tom RDD

I Wish You Were Here...

I'm sorry, I didn't hear you over how generic you are

... and no the title is not a dig at LTJ. It is just a rather amusing comeback I thought up yesterday. Anyway, enjoy this song off Less Than Jake's "Hello Rockview" album.



Peace.Love.Respect.Unity

-- Tom RDD

It's your shoes...

Potentially the last video of the day unless I find another song that I really feel the need to share with you, oh reader of my blog. Enjoy this one from "back in the day".



Peace.Love.Respect.Unity

-- Tom RDD

The Meanest Of Times

TUUUUUUNE!

Ska'd 4 Life

No matter how much I've changed over the last few years and how much I may change over the course of my life I will always be a rude boy at heart.

S/K/A: Feeding The Addiction





Peace.Love.Respect.Unity

-- Tom RDD

Anarchy For The UK

It's certainly been a while since I wrote anything vaguely political but with the resignation of Gordon Brown and the start of a Conservative - Lib Dem government it's hard not to address the situation. Firstly, I don't think Gordon Brown is anywhere near as bad as people make him out to be. The downfall in the economy was not his fault. A single man cannot be blamed for a world wide problem. Personally, I think he has been used as a scapegoat for a lot of things and the Conservatives pounced on this during the political debates. I am not a huge Gordon Brown fan but I would vote for him any day if it meant the other man was David Cameron. The name conservative in itself implies closed mindedness and a lack of desire for change beyond tradition which, if we look at the last 100 years, is what the conservatives have stood for. I personally could not vote for a man who lets another man who is openly homophobic in his party (if that person has since been fired, good!), a man who plays on the nations irrelevant fear of immigration by proposing a "cap" when 80% of the immigrants come from within the EU meaning we cannot stop them and a man who is the front for an elitist party that looks after the rich and whenever they get into power the class divide gets bigger and bigger. Now onto Nick Clegg. Clegg impressed me during the debates, he made politicians look human and seemed genuine about his policies and his quest for change. Part of me wanted to believe after President Obama was elected that this country would rise up and vote for change in Nick Clegg but that wasn't the case. Instead "Clegg Feaver" died down and people turned to the conservatives. If one good thing to come out of the Conservatives gaining power it is that it is with a Lib Dem coalition. People have criticised Clegg (and I can see why) for joining forces (I mean Conservative and Liberal, in the same sentence? weird huh?)but at least with Clegg there the country has a shot at reform. Clegg can push and fight for those who want change and I hope that this is the case. Oh and another good thing about the election the BNP got NO seats and lost almost 500,000 votes! So at least that's a strong win for the country but not a big enough one to get rid of the fail that is David Cameron as PM. So yes, short political outburst there.

Peace.Love.Respect.Unity

-- Tom RDD

to the east...

A song that speaks to me on so many different levels and also reminds me of a better time.




Peace.Love.Respect.Unity

-- Tom RDD

do wah doo

I really cannot stop listening to this song. I usually can't stand Kate Nash, especially the way she sings. But I find the melody in this song (especially towards the end) catchy as hell and it makes me want to listen again and again.



Peace.Love.Respect.Unity

Hold On To What You Believe

It get's better than you know

Sometimes all it takes is a cup of tea, a chat with a good friend and a walk home in the rain to remind you of who you are underneath all the emptiness you feel. Thank you. You have reminded me of a person I used to be but forgot about.

Inside My Head I Can Be Anything

Such a beautiful song. It was used in my recent performance at The University Of Worcester and although I have listened to it so many times it still makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up.

Myspace

That's right. I've done the unthinkable and gone back to Myspace. Remember that? The thing before facebook and the thing that was just that much better than bebo (whatever that was). So why did I go back and spend a good 30 minutes editing my profile so it relates to the person I am now? I guess it just reminds me of a time in my life where things were different. The last time I went on myspace and actually edited the thing was back in 2008 when I was still at Kent Uni. I read through all the stuff I had written about myself and wondered if that was actually who I am now. Well a lot has changed and a lot has stayed the same. I would like to think I have grown up in the two years since I last looked at it. The most obvious change I can think of is my music taste. It has swayed ever so slightly to include rock n' roll, folk, jazz, indie and other things. I have always been and still am to an extent very closed minded when it comes to music. I was very adamant (and still am) that mainstream music was/ is killing the independent scene, for instance I used to hate indie because it was the "in thing" and I saw it as having something to do with the demise of the Brighton ska scene. But in all honesty if kids need to follow a trend to feel they belong that's their curse.

When I look at what I've written about myself it's slightly harder to judge how I've changed. Deep down I know I am still the same caring person who is passionate about the people I love and the art I create. But I no longer think I am as optimistic as I used to be. Growing older has made me more cynical, more questioning about peoples motives and less trusting. I look at the friends who have come and gone over the last few years of my life and think they have a lot to do with this. The people I have known have help shape me. The good friends have reminded me that people are inherently good and will come to your aid in a time of need, be with you through the good and the bad and I will forever love them for that. Others however have shown me that humans are also incredibly selfish creatures. Of course I should see the good in people, there have been more good friends than bad but it's the hurt that sticks with me. The pain they've caused stays with me and will do for months/ years to come. In ways it has been a good thing. It has meant I have written some music I am incredibly proud of but at the same time it has hurt me beyond explanation and for some reason I still can't let go. Call it petty but I will always remember how people have hurt me and I don't forgive easily and I don't forget.

I look back on who I used to be and who I am now. I have changed. Somethings have changed for the better and some things have changed for the worst. I would like to think I have learnt from my mistakes, that the good and the bad have shaped me into the person I see in the mirror every day. Change is the natural progression of life and it's who is by your side when you change and how they help shape that change that really matters.

Peace.Love.Respect.Unity.

-- Tom RDD